The Flippant Girl's Guide to Completing Your WIP

I write today's Friday Fives prompt several days in advance from the discomfort of the veterinary emergency room where The White One has caused me and Hubby too much stress in a small amount of time*. 

With all this kitty (not to mention Alicia) drama, I am painfully behind my NaNoWriMo word count and each setback like this one is enough for me to tear out all my hair. Right now I just want to get it done and retire into an afghan-making frenzy**. If only there were a way to get this done in an efficiently painless way.

There is.

1. Drink in abundance Ernie Hemingway style. With tons of alcohol floating in your system, your internal editor will be too drunk to tell you that your prose sucks or your storyline is flat. To hell with your liver, you must keep your editor inebriated at all times.

2. Write gibberish whenever there is a section in your WIP where you don't know how to write what you need. For example, if I wanted to include more on this section, it would probably read like:
something like this where I know I want to include something, but really not sure what. This is a pretty important section on how to expand on your filler because without the filler you wouldn't know about certain aspects of your character's inner life or overall backstory.

3.  Switch stories AND points of view mid-novel. This will not only throw your writer brain into a mild panic, but during revision you can legitimately ask, "What drunk asshole wrote this?"

4. Have someone write it for you. You came up with the idea, why not have someone else do the heavy lifting? As long as you tell them characters, plots and subplots, and resolution, let them run wild. Then you can go somewhere and catch up on all that TV in the DVR...

5. Make your WIP a scrapbook. If you can merge cute photographs and stamps and such, it will be more colorful and very tactile. You can start your own trend.

* Not to worry, The White One's issue isn't life threatening or anything, if it was I wouldn't be blogging from the ER waiting room. At the risk of TMI, he is having a major bout of constipation that could have been easily rectified if the vet just listened to me on Sunday when I had originally said, "Can't we just unclog him?"
** I have my reasons for this.
_______ hit of the day: Thinking of You by A Perfect Circle