This weekend, a bouncy house tried to kill me. This weekend I went to my goddaughter's 3rd birthday party where the main attraction was a Shrek bouncy house. I knew this was coming and Steph ( one crazy hat participant ) kept saying I would have to go into the bouncy house. I said I'd break the damn thing. Of course, when my goddaughter pointed for me to go in, I had no choice but comply. Somehow all the other children at the party had disappeared from the bouncy house fun, which left only the two of us in there. My goddaughter bounced up a storm and threw her weight around like nobody's business. The impact still moved the entire thing and I would in turn bounce as well. I managed to keep the bouncing to a minimum. Bouncy houses are as fun as I remember. The downside is that they are made with children in mind. There should be a disclaimer not to go too close to the netting. As my goddaughter bounced to her heart's content, I ended up moving across the leng...

It was brought to my attention that tomorrow is Squirrel Appreciation Day . I have mixed feelings about this, as I sort of fear a squirrel uprising where they will overtake the world. Yes, this is irrational, but I've seen the Eastern Gray Squirrel in action and it's not pretty. Reasons Squirrels Will Overtake The World 1. They're small enough that they can sneak into places and nibble on important wires. 2. They have aggressive tendencies, especially when it comes to feeding, that would help push squirrel power to the fore. 3. I believe that Harvard is doing experiments on them. 4. They're nests are indestructible. 5. They work in packs. And just like a sea of rats, there is no doubt that these little critters will. fuck. you. up.

I previously stated how my cats are the best form of distraction ever. I still hold to that, but would like to add a disclaimer: DISTRACTIONS ARE BAD WHEN THEY HIT BEFORE DAYLIGHT. In case you've never seen the cats, look here: Cute, huh? They are the devil incarnate. Cheyenne (the stripey one) is viciously clever and somewhat of a trouble maker. She has a tendency to open doors and tear open bags of treats. Lucky (the white one) is rather dumb and quite possibly can be considered the Tommy Lee of the feline world. He also likes to destroy things - vases get smashed, video cards cracked, keyboard keys pulled off... you get the idea. He's also some kind of Oriental cat so he talks. Frequently. We've gotten used to these kitty quirks. They're cats, this is what they do. It's summer, so they like the windows to be open. We have a small one that stays open in our bedroom during the summer that overlooks our driveway and the side street. Since they're indoor cats, th...